Unless you have clear objectives, it’s probably best to think twice before attending impromptu meetups and events.
I was relatively an okay meetup goer compared to my average peers. I embraced the “Do It Together” paradigm and since I was already here in “the Melting Pot”, it was common sense to hang out and attend events to get connections.
However, most of the time, like 98% of it, most of us care about ourselves, or at least what we think about other things. It’s our nature. We can’t help but yawn as soon as our mind realizes the thing in front of us isn’t about us. Especially in today’s fast-paced world and among New York City’s fastest-walking living things, you can add another 1.9% to that Percentage.
Attending a meet up without a clear objective based on your interests only can be a waste of time and energy. Without a plan, you’d just end up curling in a corner and be a good silent audience. Most of the time, you would end up going home taking back O-so-little.
Objective, objective, objective.
I can’t repeat enough. Be sure you bring more than a mere enthusiasm of the topic to the meetup. You need to first decide what you want from the event. Is it to learn a new knowledge from a renowned specialist, look for a new job (Note that I did not state job opportunity as an objective) give a speech on a topic or to get an investor? Be clear and stick to the objective so you don’t spend that few hours being washed to something else because a lot can be happening in an event. An objective will give you a steering wheel and help you decide what needs to be prioritized, declined or even when it’s time to go home.
Game Plan
Chicago Bulls did not get their championship because of Michael Jordan. He was magnificent, but he’d always been there until Phil Jackson showed up. It’s Jackson’s and Tex Winter’s Triangle Offense that won the consecutive trophies.
Game plan is simply a more detailed roadmap of the objective. How you should carry on in the event to meet the ultimate goal. This requires background research on key attendants, the drinks provided, the setting to the subway routes you will be taking to the event. Is it a townhall-style seminar, a loose meetup with free-flow beer and pizzas or a little bit of both? Who will be speaking at the event? Which one would you like to talk to afterward? Do you even bring the cards with you?
Confidence Matters
This is almost the most important thing, and it’s probably why you should at least have something about yourself prepared to talk about or show to anyone. People don’t care about you unless you care about what you do. You have to make sure you know that you are not just another face in the crowd.
Consider this two scenarios…
- “Hi, I’m Joe! I’m working as a <__fill in any boring desk job title__> at <__fill in anything that’s not Google, Facebook, Twitter or LinkedIn__>. Nice to meet you.”
- “Hi, I’m Stephen! Friends call be Stevie and my sweetheart calls me hun, but you can call me Stevie! I’m very passionate about <__fill in any interesting field__> and in fact I’m working on <__fill in your catchy project name__> and I’d love to hear your feedbacks.”
Notice that when you have a project, you tend to gain this semi-boasting confidence and a chance to downplay it with humility. It is also a great way to dodge talking about your day job which is a bore for most people. They want to be entertained by your ambition and inspired by your dedication. When you decidedly distinguish yourself, the actions will follow and people will be able to tell you out of the crowd. It’s like seeing a person looking up to the sky while others are strolling for groceries.
Even without an interesting project, having an objective can already boost your confidence. The lack of one is almost certainly a confidence killer.
Don’t Be Afraid to Walk Out
Only amateurs stick around until half way in to walk out. If you realize the event isn’t the right place for you, and you start to question yourself why you are there, don’t be shy to walk out early. Remember again that people don’t care unless you walk out in the middle of their speech. So the early you walk out the better it is for yourself and others.
Conclusion
Think of a clear objective and game plan before pushing that RSVP on meetup website. You don’t want to obligate yourself with something you aren’t sure of and getting into the seat of others. It’s always okay to set in a cafe and work on your stuff alone if that’s what it takes to gain you confidence to attend the next meet up.
